Author Topic: Am I addicted to casomorphin?  (Read 4297 times)

Digitalsmgital

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Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« on: November 20, 2013, 01:33:30 AM »
Hi. My name is Dave. I am addicted to cheese.

I try to limit myself to less than one and a quarter pounds of cheese per week. (about 1/2 kilo) Around 65 lb.s a year. That is  more than your average Frenchman. (the world's leader per capita)

Époisses, cheddar, gouda, I love it.

Fresh or aged, I crave it.

Goat's milk, cow's milk, sheep. You name it, I have abused it.

Now I see how my beloved cheese contains casomorphins, which are peptides broken down from casein in my body, having a distinct morphine effect on me. Hallelujah, praise the Lord. (Pass the tequila)

Should I be alarmed? Has anyone ever jeopardized their job and family on account of a cheese addiction? I think not!

Without cheese, animal husbandry would not have evolved to the extent that it led to a social revolution.

Without cheese, human commerce would have stagnated to a point where highly populated regions would not intersect.

Without cheese, we would still be in the Dark Ages, searching for a shot glass, lime, and salt. Screw that.

Discuss.

Spoons

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #1 on: November 20, 2013, 04:17:39 AM »
Hi, My name is Eric... and I'm a cheese addict.


Should I be alarmed? Has anyone ever jeopardized their job and family on account of a cheese addiction? I think not!

Discuss.

I'm jeopardizing my job as we speak, I spend quite some time at work tweaking my cheese making control sheet in Excel and shopping online for cheese making stuff. I recently planned my curd knife build while at work and the curd knife was also built at work (I only have basic tools at home)... oh, and I check this damn forum like 20 times a day while at work ???

I too eat about a pound of cheese per week. I don't think I'm addicted though. I can go weeks without eating cheese.  I think I'm more addicted to the hobby of making cheese, maybe this is because I only recently got back into it from a two-year hiatus.

Without cheese, animal husbandry would not have evolved to the extent that it led to a social revolution.

Without cheese, human commerce would have stagnated to a point where highly populated regions would not intersect.

Without cheese, we would still be in the Dark Ages, searching for a shot glass, lime, and salt. Screw that.

Cheese is definitely not just a food item. It's played it's fair role in the shaping of regional customs. Where I am, for instance, there's a curd festival every year that we French Canadians take pride in. We love our squeaky cheese curds to that point! It's almost a cultural thing. Also, the cheese factory nearby, in St-Albert, burned down about a year ago. That place was a staple to us Franco-Ontariens. It's a piece of our identity, yet, isn't it just a factory that produces mass amounts of cheese? Why did we feel so attached to it and hurt when we learned it burned down? yes, cheese is much more than just a food item.

george

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #2 on: November 20, 2013, 11:10:47 AM »
A pound or a pound and a quarter a week?  Amateurs ...   ;D

Offline Tiarella

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #3 on: November 20, 2013, 12:13:49 PM »
Hi, my name is Kathrin and I'm addicted to cheese making.  It started out slow and innocent at first.  It was not my fault, it was only because my goats were producing too much milk to use up in other ways.  And then there was the fact that we don't like to buy food but like to eat some cheese with all the pesto we make on the bread we make with the tomatoes we grow.  We are just victims here trying to keep our heads above water.......and we've given up keeping our bellies above water because they are so full of food.   :-\

I actually don't like to eat tons of cheese but I can't help myself from experimenting and working towards creating cheese beauty.  I give  more cheese away than I eat and my partner rarely eats cheese at all.  (he's somewhat dairy intolerant) Is this impacting my life?  Yes!  I'm making cheese for hours when I could be lying around eating bonbons.  (or, more realistically, working in the gardens)   ???

Offline H-K-J

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #4 on: November 20, 2013, 02:17:25 PM »
A pound or a pound and a quarter a week?  Amateurs ...   ;D
LOL ;D
My wife say's I'm in denial, (I a'm not >:()
Never hit a man with glasses, use a baseball bat!
http://cocker-spanial-hair-in-my-food.blogspot.com/

Alpkäserei

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #5 on: November 20, 2013, 11:08:33 PM »
http://www.swissinfo.ch/eng/archive/Record_growth_in_Swiss_cheese_consumption.html?cid=5174336

Amateurs

up to 21.28 kg/head in 2012. that's averages now, includes those who eat little cheese. The average per head is one number, the amount eaten by the average person is a different number altogether, much higher. Rural folks especially tend to eat more cheese -it's a staple food in rural and Alpine regions, after all.

Digitalsmgital

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #6 on: November 22, 2013, 01:54:55 PM »
A pound or a pound and a quarter a week?  Amateurs ...   ;D

Ha!  ;D



 The average per head is one number, the amount eaten by the average person is a different number altogether, much higher. Rural folks especially tend to eat more cheese -it's a staple food in rural and Alpine regions, after all.

LOL, can you imagine eating 4 pounds of cheese a week?

Yes, I admit to eating over 100 kilograms of cheese per year, an astounding number. ;D

 What number, according to popular Western Medicine, would be acceptable? 10? 20 kilos?

Because I am trying to limit my intake, I know exactly by how much I am failing.

A question for the forum:
How much cheese do you estimate that you eat every week?

I should like to see 100 kilos of various cheeses assembled on my dining table, just for reference purposes. You know, I wouldn't eat it or anything.
« Last Edit: November 24, 2013, 05:40:27 PM by Digitalsmgital »

linuxboy

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #7 on: November 22, 2013, 03:56:15 PM »
Yes, you are addicted. I recommend aversion therapy. You must eat so much cheese, you can't stand it any more. I am able to write a 100% bona fide legit fake prescription.

Could you imagine being able to submit receipts for cheese on your FSA for reimbursement? Reason: "cheese therapy".

Spoons

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #8 on: November 22, 2013, 04:09:56 PM »
I wonder if my coverage would pay for a Neuro-Caseusologist consultation.

linuxboy

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #9 on: November 22, 2013, 04:14:54 PM »
"Doctor, he's not responding to the brie!"
"100 grams Epoisses, stat. NOW PEOPLE!"

Alpkäserei

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #10 on: November 22, 2013, 06:35:17 PM »
*Breaking News*

Cheese Chemists from the treacherous jungle regions of southern France have developed a new cheese with a paste so smooth and creamy it can be administered intravenously. Illegal 'cheese houses' are opening throughout the Western European countries where this illegal cheese is smuggled and sold for high prices. The illegal cheese trade is having obvious immediate affects on the youth of these countries. 'We can't can't watch them all the time' one parent in a troubled Naples neighborhood reported. 'Since the cheese has hit the streets, it's like they don't even care any more. Don't want to work, spend all of their money. It's sad, I wish the police would do something about it.'

Authorities estimate that this new cheese is the worst problem to afflict European streets in decades.

'France has had a cheese problem for centuries' prime minister Jean-Marc Ayrault said in  a recent interview. 'When De Gaulle made his famous quote about the 246 varieties of cheese, he hit the nail right on the head.' Ayrault said 'We just couldn't control them then, and today it is worse. Now these new cheeses, I don't Know. What hope is there for the France of tomorrow if the kids just want the cheese?'
'You want to know the real secret' Ayrault continued 'we can't fight a war, because the cheese problem is so bad. Our soldiers are addicted to the cheese, they can't shoot their guns, can't fight, they just lie around in the trenches all day. It is shameful, we have to get England to bail us out every time someone shows up.'

Much of France's illegal cheese trade is centered in the rugged Alpine regions, where it is difficult for authorities to enforce the rule of law. Illegal cheese chemists hide out high up in the mountains during the summer months where, isolated from civilization, they can freely cook cows milk into these dangerous substances with little danger of being caught and arrested by concerned officials. 'It's a major problem' one offical said 'they know the mountains. They can easily hide out in some isolated holler and avoid us. And we never know if they may be armed. There are some places in the hills where you just don't go, not if you're smart.'
« Last Edit: November 22, 2013, 06:46:21 PM by Alpkäserei »

Spoons

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #11 on: November 22, 2013, 07:09:08 PM »
Illegal cheese chemists hide out high up in the mountains during the summer months where, isolated from civilization, they can freely cook cows milk into these dangerous substances with little danger of being caught and arrested by concerned officials. 'It's a major problem' one offical said 'they know the mountains.


France officials are looking for one particular cheese chemist. He's known as the "Heisenberg" or "Walter White" of the illegal cheese world... Have you seen this man?


linuxboy

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #12 on: November 22, 2013, 07:27:44 PM »
Who is that guy? Looks terrifying. Help.

(kudos on the google-fu)

Digitalsmgital

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #13 on: November 23, 2013, 11:29:34 AM »
Quote from: Alpkäserei

Much of France's illegal cheese trade is centered in the rugged Alpine regions, where it is difficult for authorities to enforce the rule of law. Illegal cheese chemists hide out high up in the mountains during the summer months where, isolated from civilization, they can freely cook cows milk into these dangerous substances with little danger of being caught and arrested by concerned officials. 'It's a major problem' one offical said 'they know the mountains.

LOL!

Now I know what al Queda was doing in those caves!


Offline Tiarella

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Re: Am I addicted to casomorphin?
« Reply #14 on: November 23, 2013, 03:47:45 PM »
I just love the humor of forum members!   ^-^