Well, Happy Anniversary! I hope you had a lovely day with your wife.
Vinegar is an acid, as are lemon juice, citric or tartaric acid, etc. If it works for you, go for it - with using the vinegar, you probably don't have to get your whey as hot.
I personally don't like using aluminum for any food anymore, but especially for acidic foods like cheese. They've been linking aluminum and Alzheimer's, a disease my FIL died of, so I'm very leery.
I've never added milk to my whey for ricotta making, either. But then again, I make my cheese in 5 gallon batches and the two pounds of ricotta I get from the whey is a bonus.
I'm not familiar with a "jam pan" - probably regional differences in names for items is my guess. I use my 5 gallon stainless steel canner for making cheese.